Looks More Like a Puma

Hakuna Matata: What a wonderful phrase

Hakuna Matata: Ain’t no passin’ craze

It means no worries for the rest of your days

It’s our problem free philosophy

Hakuna Matata

-The Lion King

I say to you, do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on.

-Matthew 6:25

When Jesus agrees with Timon and Pumba, clearly the key to happiness is at hand! No worries. Just let  your cares go and drift through life in indolent apathy. Right?

It should work. As long as you don’t have worries, you  won’t be worried about them. As long as you don’t have worries. Turns out - you actually do have to eat. And you actually do need clothing. And you do have innate responsibilities (like being king!). These things are unavoidable (remember, Simba didn’t run for office). This is by design. God could have made us not to need food, it would not have been difficult for Him. So why, if He doesn’t want us to be worried, does He  give us real things to be worried about?

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Philippians 4:6-7

God-given concerns are an oppurtunity. A chance to depend on and trust in God - and then to glorify Him with thanksgiving when He proves faithful once again.

Do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord;

-Ephesians 5:18-19

It should be noted that pretty much all the credit for this post goes to my friends Kevin, who had  the original idea, and Daniel, who brilliantly pushed the analogy to its breaking point.

Who would think to associate being filled with the Holy Spirit and drunkeness so closely as to mention them in the same breath? I certainly thought it was weird until I remembered that the two have been confused since Pentecost when some folks thought the Spirit-filled apostles were drunk (at which point Peter opened his first great evangelistic sermon by saying “We’re not drunk, it’s only 9 in the morning!”).

But what could we spiritual Christians possibly learn from drunkards? Consider this: Suppose I wake up in the  morning and it is my intention to spend to the entire day drunk. So naturally, I take a sip of a beer, say to myself, “that outta do it,” and go about my day. You can clearly see the result: mission failure! In order to get and stay plastered, I’m going to need to continuously consume a great quantity of alcohol. So how can I expect to be filled with the Spirit with only a minimal time investment?

So, if Christianity is like getting drunk; what does that make the church, a bar? Perhaps - there are certain similarities:

• Note that in bars, there are two kinds of people: committed drunkards and (shudder) social drinkers. These people have missed the point! They’re in an establishment dedicated to the consumption of alcohol and they come for the atmosphere. Or the food. Or to  meet their friends. What a waste of bar stools.
• Another consideration: snooty drinkers. All drinks are useful for the purposes of getting drunk, but these people obnoxiously insists on one particular drink. They’re more concerned about flavor than substance!
• And never forget that serious drinking is best done in groups so you can be continuously encouraging eachother and sharing the joy of your experiences.

Finally, a toast: To my Christian brothers and sisters - may you be filled with the Holy Spirit, even to (apparent) drunkeness!

Fine print: OBVIOUSLY this post is not intended condone being drunk. Neither is it intended to condemn drinking, incidentally.

When tragedy strikes, it’s easy to ask “Why, God?”.

But when annoyance strikes, that’s rarely the first thing that comes to mind. When I get stopped at a red light, my most natural response is to wonder how I could possibly hit seven in a row! Or how is it necessary for this rinky-dink cross street to have a such a long light? There’s nothing there but a Food Lion (which I now hate by association). Turns out - God made red lights.  What’s more, He engineered the circumstances that put me at that red light at that exact moment. Why would a loving God do that?! He could have made it green - would have been no trouble at all.

Well, friends I can’t tell you why you got a flat tire or why there’s noisy tree frogs in your pool or why there’s a guy driving 45 in the left lane of the interstate or why Windows has so many bugs… But! I do know why God made red lights. (Somehow, I feel like I shouldn’t be giving this secret away for free…but I really don’t have time to monetize it, so)t:

1. Get some index cards.
2. Write Bible verses on them - reference on one side, verse on the other.
3. Stick them to the sun visor in the driver’s seat of your car.
4. When you get stuck at a red light - pull one down, read it, think about it for a sec, and it should be about time to go again.
5. Work on it in your head until you get to the next red light.
6. Check your knowledge, then pull down the next card.

Do this for long enough, and you’ll learn to hate green lights! (maybe)

Also, when you make your index cards (if you tweet), tweet which verses you’re working on with the tag #MemoryVerseMonday. It’s not a meme yet, but it totally should be.

Half a dozen drafts of incomplete blog posts.

Is this what they call writer’s block? Half a dozen genuinely good ideas abandoned because I couldn’t negotiate the difference between how good they sounded in my head, and how lousy they sounded on paper. What is the solution? Don’t ask me! I’m just musing out loud. (No, seriously - I don’t even know right now if I’m going to publish this or not)

How did I get started blogging? On a whim, actually. I just thought to myself, “Self: I do some thinking occasionally, here and there, and it would be nice to have an outlet for some of it. It may be that I have something of value to offer to the internet.” In that inspiration I wrote my seminal second post (trust me, it makes sense) - a suggestion on how electrical engineering could be taught better. Certainly not an area in which I have any expertise!

And where did I crash? I was working on an entry - proof I had discovered that theistic evolution could not be true, when it occured to me that I was surely not the first person to observe what I had noticed. (It was obvious, but it wasn’t that insightful). So I googled, and…turns out, they do have an answer for my ironclad argument. They’re still wrong, but for the first time I felt the weight of my having joined a 5000 (roughly) year old conversation - the human conversation of all that is known and speculated consisting of every written work ever. And how annoying am I, jumping in in the middle, woefully ignoranat of most of what’s already been said, proudly spouting off a bunch of well known ideas as if I was the first to think of them. I certainly now feel an obligation to try and get caught up, and am discovering the daunting enormity  of the task. Turns out,  I can find new books I want to read way faster than I can read them.

So, how then can I write, knowing that I know so little? What have I to offer? There are a couple possibilities:

1 - If the substance is not new, perhaps the formulation is. Perhaps the way I pose a thought, necessarily unique, is valuable even if its substance isn’t necessarily unique. Or perhaps it’s worthwhile (especially to those who know me) to know that I’m the one saying it. Discussing college football with one’s friends is quite different from hearing even the same exact words from the talking suits on espn. Or perhaps even the meduim and timing are valuable. If I didn’t know what I’m saying until yesterday, there’s a fair chance the reader hadn’t heard until today, the classic book written in 1450 notwithstanding.

2 - Why do 2nd graders write? Clearly not because they have insights about the workings of the world that have been hidden from the rest of us. In fact, 2nd graders write (in school) to practice writing - in preparation for the day when they have something that must be expressed on paper. Though I may have nothing of import to impart now, it doesn’t hurt to write what I have been given, on the off chance that a philo sophia and a James 1:5 prayer may result in some sophia that will need written expression. (Definitely gotta get fluent in Greekglish!)

Well, I don’t think it was a question of ‘why blog’ that cursed my writing with clumsiness, but seeing as I don’t actually know what did, and I’m pushing the limit of internet attention spans, I’ll go ahead and cut it off here. Perhaps tomorrow it will be given me my desire to Ephesians 4:15.

EDIT - Well, I’m not entirely happy with it, but unlike all my other drafts, this one has a beginning, a middle, and an end. I Suppose I could put it up.

I’ve been at the beach on my birthday before.

I’ve been at summer camp on my birthday before.

I’ve been on a submarine at the north pole on my birthday before.

But never

               in the history of the world

                                                     have I been at school on my birthday.

Before tomorrow…